Silence is Violence
by DAISY THOMAS
As much as Utahns like to believe we are a big, open, family friendly state, so much goes unspoken, unsaid, unacknowledged, and unaddressed that we must stop and ask ourselves why. Why do so many of us pretend that there aren't giant white elephants in nearly every room? Is it from fear of trampling if acknowledged? Is it for politeness's sake because of course there's an elephant? Do we just not care or have so many of us been conditioned to believe that if we're stuck with the giant white elephant, so should others? Have too many of us felt no one else could understand or have experienced something so unimaginable as a giant white elephant?
It doesn't matter why at this point. Mere trappings to keep us afraid to openly discuss the abuses we continue to suffer.
The COVID-19 pandemic has only magnified many issues many in our communities have been stating for years with little to no solutions or even acknowledgement. According to Claudia Geist, associate dean for research in the U's School for Cultural and Social Transformation in a recent article by Heather May for the University of Utah, " Everybody who is vulnerable is more vulnerable. Everything that is unequal is more unequal: racial disparities, health outcomes, the digital divide, gender pay gap, domestic responsibilities."
SHIFT SUMMIT
According to our state government's own website, 1 in 3 women experience sexual violence in their lifetimes. Rape is the only violent crime in Utah that occurs at a higher rate than the rest of the nation. 1 in 8 Utah women have been or will be raped and 1 in 50 Utah men have been or will be raped in their lifetimes, with no data available beyond the gender binary. Sexual violence is a societal issue and we must start by acknowledging and believing that it is all around us.
We must believe because we know what it's like not to be. We know what it's like to turn to someone you trust, only to have them respond with further violence. We believe because We know what it's like to be believed, but dismissed. To come forward, to speak up, only to be told to be quiet, we don't want to hear it. You got what you deserved.
We believe because we know what it is like to be told in words and in deeds that we don't matter. To be guilted, blamed, shamed, ignored, forgotten, or shunned. We believe because we know what it is like to be terrified to report, let alone verbalize aloud, your abuse. Afraid of the perceived, accompanying judgment, reliving the trauma, the prying questions, the pity, the disgust, the sadness, the sympathy, the empathy, the fear that once we share our truth we will never be looked at the same.
But we believe that when we stand up, speak out, share our truth, our knowledge, our challenges, we will overcome them. The power of social media has put our ability to share on hyperspeed. It is a hard world to navigate, but it is our world. We get to share each other's pain, not to wallow, but to ease that burden. We are here to stand together and say no more, we are done being victimized by a system that will not recognize our humanity.
We believe we are going to change that system. We believe you because we are you.